A Letter to My Younger Self

I once had a great therapist who suggested I write a letter to my younger self. I wrote the letter, but was very brief. I guess I was a little afraid of what I might discover. I recently read a letter that someone else wrote to their younger self. It inspired me to write mine over.


Dear Little Rip,


1. Never be afraid to be yourself
I know there will be times in your life where the urge to fit in will be great, almost too much to resist, but don't give in. The feeling inside that you want to fix will eventually disappear. Trying to fix your insides by changing your outsides will never work. Your compassionate personality is one of your greatest gifts. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Your ability to see the best in everyone is why so many people love you, don't lose it.  Most of all, don't ever feel that being yourself is wrong or somehow less than others. People sometimes try to hurt those that are unique and wonderful. They do this out of their own insecurities, it has nothing to do with you. Keep being you.


2. Never give up
When you make it to 8th grade you will be one of the most intelligent people in your school. You will be recognized for your outstanding achievements. Other kids might laugh at you, but it is because they are jealous and envious. They wish that they too could possess the knowledge that you carry in your head. Keep doing what you are doing. You will want to give up because you don't think having good grades is worth being made fun of, but it is worth it. Those people will one day be gone and your fear and loneliness will disappear. Hang in there. Don't ever stop drawing. You are so good at it, but one day you might wake up and realize you have lost the gift after not doing it for many years. Keep drawing and being creative. Doing what you love is one of the greatest gifts of life.


3. Always forgive
I hate to tell you this, but you are going to get beat up by a bunch of guys during PE one day in the changing room. It won't physically hurt, but it will hurt you emotionally. You will want to hate all of them and wish bad things on them, but don't. Forgive them. Carrying that resentment will only lead you to more feelings of insecurity and loneliness. I know you are going to feel all alone when it happens and you will cry, that is ok. It will pass. Just remember that no one hurts you because you deserve it, they hurt you because they don't like themselves.


4. Stay Sensitive
Always keep your sense of compassion and love for everything. Being sensitive is probably your greatest gift of all. You can sense others' pain and you have a desire to comfort them. Keep doing that. Your stuffed animal Dusty, you never get rid of him. You will still have him when you are 36 because he reminds you of security and love. Never lose that. You know what it feels like to be the underdog right now, but one day you will use that feeling to wrap your arms around another human being and say "I have been there. I know it hurts, but it gets better. I love you." This is a gift given to you from God. Cherish it and nurture it.


5. Have fun
I know that sometimes you feel that you have to be responsible. You feel like you have to hold it together for your Mom. I know you are scared that if your mom knows how you feel that she won't be able to handle it. She will be able to handle it. She knows you are just a child. She doesn't expect you to be her rock. She wants you to play, laugh, run, draw, and love. Seeing you happy is what she wants more than anything. Enjoy life, it doesn't last nearly as long as you imagine.


6. It is not your fault
I know you are confused right now about your Dad. You wonder sometimes that if you do something wrong that it will cause him to get upset and scare you. You can't make him that way. Your Dad loves you very much. He is sick right now though. He is going to make it hard to feel like you didn't cause all of his problems. Sometimes he might even tell you that one of his problems is your fault. It is not. Continue to love him, but know that he suffers from a sickness that is beyond your control. One day he will get different and you guys will talk and laugh and enjoy one another's company. It takes a long time, but it is worth it. Your Dad does love you a lot.


7. Drugs?
This is tough to talk about to you Little Rip. One day you will be faced with a choice. The choice is whether or not you will use drugs. It is difficult to tell you what to do because while drugs will cause you more pain than you will ever know, the result of getting off of them and starting a new life will give you joys you could never imagine. I can't make that decision for you. Drugs will cause you to see things that will give you nightmares long after you quit them. They will cause you to lose friends and loved ones. You will see people die. You will see people do things to get more drugs that will upset you. You will do things to get more drugs that will make you question whether or not life is worth living. If you choose the path of drugs you will get clean one day. Once you get clean you will experience life as you have never seen it before. Trees will be greener, skies will be bluer, rain will be wetter, and love will overtake you. It is an amazing life, but only because you have been to Hell and realize how great every moment of life is. If you choose not to do drugs, I don't know what will happen. Maybe you become a successful Doctor. Maybe you become a fireman. I do not know the answer. It might be better than the alternative, but it might not be near as fulfilling as getting life back after losing it. I hope that whatever decision you make is the one that makes you happiest.


8. Be happy
The most important advice I will give you is to be happy. Life will pass you by so quickly and I can tell you that the worst part about getting older is regretting your past. If you are happy then everything you do is not regretted. Regret comes from not being happy in the moment. Always remember that happiness is the way you were made to be. Be happy and spread it to everyone around you.




Little Rip, I hope I have given you good advice. I know life is tough for you, but you will make it. No matter how bad you want to give up, no matter how hard it is to stand again after being pushed down, stand back up. When you feel you have nothing left inside of you and you cant go on, push just a tiny bit harder. You will stand again. Love those around you and spread your joy. I love you.


Your best friend,
You